*.mscrosby

It’s funny. You say to someone “I am working from home tomorrow” and they give you that knowing smile or the elbow and say “right, working from home, Gotcha!”

Seriously though, when I say I am working from home, it almost always means a 12 hour day. It’s really hard to pull yourself away from the computer when there is no one bothering you. Sure, I’ve had 12 hour days in the office before (more than I care to remember), but for the most part I get into the office in the morning and I leave 8 hours later. The extra time on either end is spent commuting – and that can be anything from 30-75minutes in each direction depending on the day.

Although long, I’ve come to understand the value in my commute to work. I take the back roads, winding through BlueHills in Canton and Milton – it can be very relaxing so long as I don’t have some putz on my tail upset that I am doing the speed limit. It’s my time to relax – catch up on the news, think about the plans for the evening, and (particularly in the evening) it’s a time for me to just unwind before I get home. The commute home allows me to mentally switch gears before I walk in the door.

When I work from home I don’t have that same break. On the one hand its nice to be part of the hub-bub, and on the other, it’s really hard to just get up and walk away from “just one last email”. Now that I work at home every Friday, I’ve gotten better at starting and stopping my day’s work. But on a day like today where I ended up working from home unexpectedly? Well, let’s just say it’s 730pm and I am just getting to Twitter and my personal email for the first time since I logged in to work at 8am.

So yeah… If someone says to you that they are working from home, instead of doing the “wink wink nudge nudge” routine, try saying “Oh wow – make sure you take time out for lunch!”

Not even water could cut through the pounding headache I woke up with this morning. It’s my own fault – not only did I eat dinner around 11pm (which always gives me both nightmares AND heartburn), I had a can of regular coke with my food… That’s a BIG no-no for me. I get what I call a “sugar hangover”. I can barely move, my head hurts, and I just want to curl back under the covers and go back to sleep – which is exactly what I did. Upon waking up 2 hours later I realized that not only was I now going to get to the office really late (which means staying late to compensate), I still felt like crap.

What on earth could keep me so occupied that I didn’t remember to eat until 11pm, or go to bed until 1pm? Was I hard at work? No. Was I writing? Nope. Cleaning? No. I was playing WoW. Well, kinda playing. We weren’t really playing (not in the usual sense), we were just participating in an Easter quest. I was busy collecting virtual easter eggs so that I could find chocolate and other things – all in the hopes of obtaining the title “the Noble” to appear after my name.

I know how silly that sounds But it was a lot of fun! My husband & I play together, and we were playing while watching TV and talking. Last night we watched Dancing with the Stars and Castle. We’d hunt for Easter Eggs on commercials – if we weren’t sidetracked by our conversations about the shows.

Many of the places that we had to find were much higher than our level with not-so-nice creatures that could tear us to shreds just by looking at us. One of our “online friends” (ie, a member of our guild) spent an hour of his evening to take us through and help us out.

I always hear people knock online gaming, and how just because it “isn’t real” it isn’t worthwhile – but our experience has been significantly different than that. My husband & I met online some 12 years ago, and we’ve been inseparable since Day1. Many of my best friends IRL (in real life) have started from online friendships – and yes, these are people that I see, talk to, and hang out with on a regular basis… I’ve even gone to their weddings – most of which were to other gamers as well.

As with everything, “garbage in, garbage out”. It really all depends on how you approach things… If you go looking for “trouble”, you are sure to find it. But what connects us and our friends is that first and foremost, we are there for the game, and those similar interests have fueled friendships that span continents.

Maybe tonight I’ll finish up my quests and be known as “the Noble”. Then again, maybe not. The results show for DWTS will be on, and there’s also a pretty cool show on Nova about a Hobbit-sized people found to have lived on an island over 18,000 years ago. Either way, it’s sure to be a fairly relaxing, entertaining, and educational evening spent in the company of family and friends – hopefully I’ll remember to have dinner earlier though!

John Keller was talking about this today… about people just not caring that they didn’t wash their hands, or cover their mouth when they coughed, because they were just “too busy” to care.

I just finished a 1:1 software training session at my desk with someone who sounded like a walrus… you know, the deep, phlegmy cough that makes you cringe? Yeah, that. And she kept apologizing saying that it “sounded worse than it was” – I’m sure this is because she is feeling a whole lot better now than she did even yesterday… but did she really need to share it with me?

Sadly though, I understand why she came to work instead of staying home. As a permanent employee, I have sick days – but more importantly, my boss allows me to work from home if I need to so that on days when I don’t feel so great, I can stay home but still get my work done. As a temp, she simply doesn’t have that option, and where it’s day2 on the job for her calling in sick could be a disaster (particularly in such a bad economy where even temp jobs are hard to find).

So sometimes, it’s not just a matter of people not caring (though I agree a lot of times that’s probably true) – it’s that they simply don’t have a choice in the matter. At least the woman at my desk had a handkerchief and turned away from me while she coughed… As JK pointed out, that’s not usually the case.

… I didn’t hear any horns!

It didn’t dawn on me until I got to the office this morning that even though I had just encountered the most traffic I’d seen in months (*everyone* is back from vacation, apparently), I had not heard any horns. Nor had anyone cut me off – in fact, a few people in managed to use their blinkers!

It’s amazing how even a long weekend is enough for people to recharge their batteries and have a fresh perspective on life. This morning’s commute shows just how in need we are – as a collective whole – of a vacation, or at least time away from “the usual”.

I’m sure things will be back to normal by tomorrow (or perhaps even the commute home this evening) as people get back into their routines and the work that piled up while they were gone begins to overwhelm them again.

But I hope that everyone savors those few moments of peace and tries to hold on to them for as long as possible… and more importantly, recognize when the cup is almost empty and needs a refill.

I have always been fascinated by the choices that people make – as individuals, and members of society – and how those choices clearly define their life: how high they can jump, how far they can fall, and those who are “stuck” in the middle.

We know that we are masters of our own destiny, but sometimes its like fumbling in the dark for a light switch, or putting one foot in front of the other across a shaky bridge. And then there are the times that you feel as though you are on top of the world, and nothing can stand in your way – the clouds part, heavenly angels sing (etc) – and the choices we make (even as simple as saying hi to the reclusive neighbour) shape our lives.

Life is a series of interconnecting circles, some readily visible, others remaining hidden until circumstances thrust them into the spotlight. Those that can be seen by the naked eye – that is, circles and connections that are readily apparent – are carefully nurtured or studiously ignored, depending on our beliefs, desires, goals, and ambitions. It is these choices that we make, that take us along life’s path.

But what of those unseen circles? Or more importantly, the connection between seen and unseen?

I went to the mall the other day, with the intent of making a specific purchase and leaving quickly. It had been a long day, and all I wanted to do was get home and relax. As I was leaving, I decided to pickup dinner at the Subway by the exit. While standing in line, the woman in front of me struck up a conversation. It wasn’t as though Subway were busy, and we were standing there for awhile with nothing to do. Her order was being prepared, as was mine. But she said hello, and commented on the fact that I was “grabbing take-out too”.

At first I was annoyed – I really did just want to get home. But it occurred to me that she wanted to talk, so I slowed down for a couple of minutes to chat. We didn’t discuss politics or world-peace, we simply talked about our need to relax outweighing the need to make another home-cooked meal. We said our good-byes, and went our separate ways. I left, and she sat down with her husband for their impromptu dinner get-away.

On the way home it occurred to me how much better I felt after that simple conversation. Did this stranger see my stress and look to diffuse it? Or was it simply that she is outgoing by nature and talks to everyone?

Life is all about the choices we make and I am glad that I chose to slow down long enough to talk with her. She brightened my evening, and I hope that I did the same for her.

Have you brightened a stranger’s evening? Try it and see how good it can make you feel.

Not good at talking to strangers? Pick up the phone and call your mom, or sibling, or friend that you haven’t talked to in awhile – no agendas, just take a deep breath, say hello and wish them a good day.